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Thread: More Scottish Humor

  1. #21
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    ....and mine.
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  2. #22
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Even that writer could not help me.

  3. #23
    Senior Member DanEC's Avatar
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    I think I've laughed harder at this thread than any other that I can remember. You all have outdone yourselves.
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  4. #24
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    All of this comes from my workmate/friend who lives just south of the Firth of Forth east of Edinburgh.
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  5. #25
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Firth of Forth?

  6. #26
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    From Waffleheads best friend;

    The Firth of Forth (Scottish Gaelic: Linne Foirthe) is the estuary (firth) of several Scottish rivers including the River Forth. It meets the North Sea with Fife on the north coast and Lothian on the south. It was known as Bodotria in Roman times
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  7. #27
    Senior Member KING Nomad nomad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silverback View Post
    Firth of Forth?
    He came in 1st out of 4 runners.

    What part of that can't you understand?
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  8. #28
    Quote Originally Posted by James Stern View Post
    From Waffleheads best friend;

    The Firth of Forth (Scottish Gaelic: Linne Foirthe) is the estuary (firth) of several Scottish rivers including the River Forth. It meets the North Sea with Fife on the north coast and Lothian on the south. It was known as Bodotria in Roman times
    Correct James, i was there in the Roman time.

  9. #29
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by belgiumbarry View Post
    Correct James, i was there in the Roman time.
    Damn, someone older than Ron.

  10. #30
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by James Stern View Post
    From Waffleheads best friend;

    The Firth of Forth (Scottish Gaelic: Linne Foirthe) is the estuary (firth) of several Scottish rivers including the River Forth. It meets the North Sea with Fife on the north coast and Lothian on the south. It was known as Bodotria in Roman times
    Was that supposed to help?

  11. #31
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    Nope. I was hoping to add to the confusion.
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  12. #32
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    One more from my friend in Scotland.


    A Scot was drinking in a bar in London when he gets a call on his mobile. He orders drinks for everybody in the bar as he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Scottish baby boy weighing 25 pounds.

    Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the man just shrugs, "That's about average up our way, folks...like I said - my boy's a typical Highland baby boy."

    Two weeks later the man returns to the bar. Thebartender says, "Say, you're the father of that typical Scottish baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth, aren't you? Everybody's been making' bets about how big he'd be in two weeks.....so how much does he weigh now?”

    The proud father answers, "Seventeen pounds." The bartender is puzzled and concerned. "What happened? He was 25 pounds the
    day he was born.

    The father takes a slow swig from his Johnny Walker Whisky, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says, "Had him circumcised."

    God Bless The Scots!
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  13. #33
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Damn, all this time I have thought I was 3/4 French and 1/4 Irish. Guess I was wrong.

  14. #34
    Moderator James Stern's Avatar
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    The Irish and the Scots share a lot of genetics and a lot of heritage. You may be close.
    The one line never heard in Heaven "Gee! I wish I had spent a little more time in the office."

  15. #35
    Administrator Ron77's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silverback View Post


    Damn, all this time I have thought I was 3/4 French and 1/4 Irish. Guess I was wrong.
    MY ALBUMS

  16. #36
    GROUCHY FUC***G OLD APE Silverback's Avatar
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    Silverback.

    It gets crowded in here at time.

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